Several points. First, the Hell In The Cell match at last night’s Wrestlemania 28 was the absolute best WWE match in years. It wasn’t technically astounding but emotionally it wrecked me. I was practically in tears by the end and so completely invested in it that every beat carried all the weight of the best championship bouts of the past 15 years. Three men with enough inbuilt history in a moment close enough to perfection to call perfect. As TV goes it was fascinating, and truly unrepeatable, and for a wrestling fan who’s just got back into it (and hard) the gratification was immense. And Undertaker’s haircut? BALLS. AWESOME.
Seeing as we had to wait a day (and struggle with five downloads) before we could watch it I opted to get in the mood by watching Wrestlemania 20 from 2004, which was the last one I watched live and the only one I ever paid for with James Murphy and possibly Luke. I should have just enjoyed myself but everything from the packaging to the commentary to an unfortunate politics-plugging spot from The Body Ventura* kept referring to ‘Mania 1 as “twenty years ago”. The first event took place in 1985. That’s 19 years. You only have 20 years’ difference on a 20th anniversary. This very same thing always plagues me when counting comics runs. I never know when to add that extra digit or not. Gah, it hurts thinking about it. Where was I? Yesh Moneypenny, Mania 20’s a great little event. Probably the standout from it is the final triple threat match were future madman Benoit bested Triple H and HBK which is so good it distracts from future sadnesses for its 30 minute duration, and besides, the way I choose to look at it is that the Chris Benoit of 2004 is not the same mentally injured Chris Benoit that killed his wife and child three years later, and that’s an honesty. Also of note is the crowd response for the Goldberg/Lesnar bout given the non-secret that it was their last match each. A harsh NY crowd kicks it off with a “you sold out” and runs through “boring” to that horrible goodbye song that I genuinely detest, but it’s fascinating seeing two performers have to go on despite the total disinterest and smirking ref Steve Austin getting all the attention just for standing there. Elsewhere, Ultimo Dragon’s unfortunate double-botched entrance has been kindly edited for the DVD, Undertaker returns in the hat and coat as Kane screams denials at him and Rock And Sock put over Orton and pornstar-faced Batista in an enjoyable tag match. Yeah, good memories.
Secondly, Game Of Thrones is back, which is just enough to edge me close enough to reading the books I’ve had since before Christmas. I watched season one again over the weekend so as to be up to date with proceedings for the new series but they just threw a pile of new characters at me (including one played by omnipresent human Liam Cunningham who I was convinced was in it already) so I’m still a little overwhelmed but as I see it being overwhelmed in a fantasy realm is better than total familiarity as it intensifies the sense of depth and all that blah. Also I know a few fellas in it and I’ll be looking out for them with a strange sense of trepidation. Which, as I always mention, is Stone Cold Steve Austin’s favourite word. Anywhat, arms up moments aplenty, including the first appearances of wee Arya and wee wee Dinklage. Once a week’s not enough anymore. Time to undertake the biggest reading Odyssey of my young life.
Finally, Brian Bendis’ Ultimate Spider-Man, the hugely popular retelling of the wrist-swinger’s early adventures in an alternate universe where the Green Goblin is an actual GREEN GOBLIN, made the transition from awesome comic book to underwhelming cartoon yesterday. In some senses, it’s not at at all underwhelming: it looks unbelievable and the sound design is incredible, too, but it’s also populated with comedy bell rings and other such sound effects. It seems like it’s written for kids, unlike Batman: The Brave And The Bold which was deceptively kid-friendly on the outside and totally adult-pleasuringly dirty underneath. Both boast the involvement of Batman The Animated Series vet Paul Dini but it seems Disney-Marvel’s given him a shorter leash than DC did. It’s heavy on the wacky comedy (Spider-Man busts up the Frightful Four by starting a food fight) and trades on some of the humour from the Iron Man movies, too. Also, has “catch you next fall” become something people say when they’re not tripping people? It’s transcended its origiSTAN LEE!, aw wow, I can always do with an appearance from The Man. Anyway, I can see this catching on because there’s so, so much potential (JK Simmons voices Jonah fercryingoutloud) and I’d be surprised if some of this comic flab isn’t shorn because there’s a lot here that could appeal to adults if it wasn’t so compromised.
There we go. A triumvirate.
*What’s the point in having a nickname if people just insert it into your full name? I’m done with that forever.
RAMBLEAST 