Looks a lot like I’m not the only one wondering the above as this post’s getting a lot of hits from people wondering the same thing I was. Welcome, Internet traveler. I’m sorry if you sat through 22 minutes of that shit as well.
How’d this come about?
The Freeview channel Viva gets left on a lot in the flat (also called the Rambleast Omnidrome) at night thanks to the abundance of South Park and Fresh Prince reruns (and these are shows that are best watched when caught on TV – DVD doesn’t best suit them), and as a direct result of this I’ve come into accidental contact with a Canadian cartoon called Crash Canyon which has, erm, “earned” a slot ‘twixt the two most nights. Firstly I thought this was another show from Seth McFarlane and it seemed weird that I hadn’t seen any promotion for it. After all, this guy is the biggest name in TV comedy right now, so how did I miss the debut of another one of his identical products where all characters look the same with absolutely no attention paid to the animation process at all? Take a look at this and tell me you wouldn’t have thought the same –
Right? That’s a new McFarlane excretion, right? Wrong. And I couldn’t believe it at first either, but this show which looks possibly illegally similar to the Family Guy family of shows has absolutely nothing to do with Fuzzy Door Productions. I didn’t know you could get away with this. Can you get away with this? I’m not sure the program even exists any more. For one thing, (as of writing this article in March 2012) it hasn’t got a Wikipedia page (which in today’s society really says a lot – even I had a Wikipedia page once, though as I am apparently not an existing human and bear the unfortunate burden of sharing my name with an Australian tennis player, it was removed on what I consider fair grounds). It’s bad enough that it’s trading so completely on another show’s design (I mean can you imagine if another cartoon emerged that looked just like South Park or The Simpsons?), but the humour is so, so flat. Empty, dreadful humour. Characters defined each by a single characteristic.
It’s since been canceled, but how can it be so easy to get a TV show made in the first place? Can you really waltz into a pitch with such brittle gags and pilfered cels from another cartoon and get paid for a season’s worth of garbage that maybe hundred of people will work on? This thing is a waste of time and money in an economy where both are precious. How is this still happening? I could honestly write a funnier script than that for the episode of Crash Canyon I just watched, and I don’t mean that in a boastful sense, I mean only to tell the truth. The gags and interactions were so bad and I think I could do better. The last thing you want your audience to feel is a sense this strongly of conviction that they could do a better job than you.
You don’t even deserve a Wikipedia page, Crash Canyon, you cur.