What The Fuck Is Crash Canyon?

Looks a lot like I’m not the only one wondering the above as this post’s getting a lot of hits from people wondering the same thing I was. Welcome, Internet traveler. I’m sorry if you sat through 22 minutes of that shit as well.

How’d this come about?

The Freeview channel Viva gets left on a lot in the flat (also called the Rambleast Omnidrome) at night thanks to the abundance of South Park and Fresh Prince reruns (and these are shows that are best watched when caught on TV – DVD doesn’t best suit them), and as a direct result of this I’ve come into accidental contact with a Canadian cartoon called Crash Canyon which has, erm, “earned” a slot ‘twixt the two most nights. Firstly I thought this was another show from Seth McFarlane and it seemed weird that I hadn’t seen any promotion for it. After all, this guy is the biggest name in TV comedy right now, so how did I miss the debut of another one of his identical products where all characters look the same with absolutely no attention paid to the animation process at all? Take a look at this and tell me you wouldn’t have thought the same –

Can you number the counts of plagiarism? CAN YOU?

Right? That’s a new McFarlane excretion, right? Wrong. And I couldn’t believe it at first either, but this show which looks possibly illegally similar to the Family Guy family of shows has absolutely nothing to do with Fuzzy Door Productions. I didn’t know you could get away with this. Can you get away with this? I’m not sure the program even exists any more. For one thing, (as of writing this article in March 2012) it hasn’t got a Wikipedia page (which in today’s society really says a lot – even I had a Wikipedia page once, though as I am apparently not an existing human and bear the unfortunate burden of sharing my name with an Australian tennis player, it was removed on what I consider fair grounds). It’s bad enough that it’s trading so completely on another show’s design (I mean can you imagine if another cartoon emerged that looked just like South Park or The Simpsons?), but the humour is so, so flat. Empty, dreadful humour. Characters defined each by a single characteristic.

It’s since been canceled, but how can it be so easy to get a TV show made in the first place? Can you really waltz into a pitch with such brittle gags and pilfered cels from another cartoon and get paid for a season’s worth of garbage that maybe hundred of people will work on? This thing is a waste of time and money in an economy where both are precious. How is this still happening? I could honestly write a funnier script than that for the episode of Crash Canyon I just watched, and I don’t mean that in a boastful sense, I mean only to tell the truth. The gags and interactions were so bad and I think I could do better. The last thing you want your audience to feel is a sense this strongly of conviction that they could do a better job than you.

You don’t even deserve a Wikipedia page, Crash Canyon, you cur.

Out.

31 thoughts on “What The Fuck Is Crash Canyon?

  1. I found it funny, but after seeing the reaction that the show got online I decided to watch it for the first time while not drunk or exhausted and paying minimal attention.

    Holy shit this show is a load of crap, what deadbrained moron greenlighted it?

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  2. I reckon it only gets any attention in the UK because it’s sandwiched between two other really popular shows, I’m almost certain it was canceled in the US before Viva picked it up over here.

    It’s very, very bad. It’s given me some small hope that I could get a cartoon greenlit, though.

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    1. For good reason it’s a retarded show, no one in their right mind would like this show it’s a piece of crap, it’s even dumber then Family guy. The mom’s a bitch, the daughter is fucking stupid, the son is a hustler, the dad is a wimp and the uncle is a idiot the rest of the cast are just plain stupid

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      1. Dude what the fuck? If you don’t like the goddamn show then don’t watch it you smart ass. I wish you’d had guts to continu a cartoon if everybody else would say its a piece of crap. People are still working on this… like the simpsons! When the simpsons appeared people were all like “uh their yellow this is bogus” but it made 24 seasons and gonna do a successful 25th! I happen to enjoy the show so shut the hell up and turn off the tv when that show comes on and you don’t want to watch it! You haters make me sick and makes me hate my generation and I’m the generation! Not “me me” but I’m only 16 so you get the point…! And if you reply to this people, say something smart and don’t be douchbags!

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      2. A) I don’t watch it. It is awful.
        B) Nobody is still working on this as it was cancelled. It is awful.
        C) The Simpsons was critically successful from the get-go and earned successive seasons. It is still produced because it makes a lot of money and is just entertaining enough that people won’t boycott it.

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  3. Same motivation – Viva, same first thought – Seth? I guess this article answers more than a wiki article could. I’m going to spare me that disappointment.

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  4. I thought it wasn’t funny, but it was entertaining. I can’t stand vernon in it, and the stereo types are irritating – but I can’t help watch it if it’s on. I would give it 3 stars. NEVER SPEAK ILL OF SETH MCFARLANE

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  5. i like the show, but then again im a moron apparently cause i also like family guy… but what do i care? laughing makes me laugh a lot which is good for my health ^^

    also the german dub is really funny… the characters all have accents from certain parts of germany xD

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  6. I also watched this terrible show tonight & I’m wishing back those oh so important minutes back. Terrible fuzzy productions imitation?

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  7. It’s not particularly the worst show I have ever seen, but it seems like it was more meant for children rather then adults.

    Crash Canyon would probably score a more accurate rating if they were to edit out most of the violence and classify it as a children’s show.

    It seems to try to much to hard to be more funny then it is and tends to fail. Most of the jokes in the show are sometimes weak and tasteless.

    It’s one of those shows I don’t mind watching if there is almost nothing on t.v. They also try to mix in things like “Family Values” or “Try To Teach Some Kind Of Lesson” I just feel perplexed at the end of the episode, not enlightened.

    It is possible to make a funny television cartoon without swears, but they don’t seem to be going in the best possible direction.

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  8. I love it. Just like I love to watch Family Guy, American Dad and South Park. You people should stop judging all the characters and just watch the show even if it´s fucking retarded. That´s just my opinion and I´m just a 14 year old girl.
    Ps. Other good tv-shows are Vikings, Game of Thrones and Robin Hood!
    Peace.

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    1. Thank you!

      Of all the people who’ve found this post (thanks, Google!), your reply has honestly been the most valuable. Surely the greatest indictment of ANY television show is that its fans will defend it for having characters that are “fucking retarded”.

      Yeah. Great. Great idea. I’ll stop expecting programmes to be good. God forbid I judged a character in a work of fiction. You probably don’t use this expression wherever you’re from, but you’re a tube.

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    1. You ever notice how people always defend things that are crap by comparing them to things that are much, much better than them, as if the comparison is somehow unfair? That happens a lot with Crash Canyon. I call it “it ain’t Shakespeare syndrome”. Who’s to say the makers of Crash Canyon shouldn’t have tried to make something as good as Groening’s shows? Instead, they identified the basic formula for modern animated comedy and, with minimal garnish, produced it as cheaply as possible. It’s as transparent an imitation as I’ve ever seen on television, made not for love but money. Of no value whatsoever.

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  9. It’s funny how you get so bitchy at a “Seth McFarlane” plagiarism show when his career is built on plagiarism, his “Calvacade” was basically taking everything and anything in pop culture and making cheap one-liners out of it, and his tv shows are all Simpsons’ photocopies.
    For what I know, Crash Canyon is the fifth “Plagiarismo of Plagiarismo” in that italian book of american criminals from The Simpsons, right after Calvacade, Family Guy, American Dad and Cleveland Show; and is better just by virtue of two things:
    Number one: It actually has a somewhat original premise, and doesn’t need to abuse the Simpsons archetypes.
    Number two: It is the only thing on that list that is not made by the same person.
    Please do know I don’t really care enough to defend this show, I just find it hilarious just how partial you are, judging a show due to its derivative appearance but glorifying the modern book example of plagiarism in comparison.
    And if you can do better, and believe me, it isn’t hard, Flash is relatively cheap and YouTube is free, please do show us how to do better, ragging like a cunt doesn’t really achieve anything if you leave it at that, it’s just your one sided opinion taking up space on the web.

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    1. “Please do know I don’t really care enough to defend this show” – And yet here you are. What, did this blog post search for YOU? You can’t claim not to care and call me a cunt without contradicting yourself.

      “I just find it hilarious just how partial you are, judging a show due to its derivative appearance but glorifying the modern book example of plagiarism in comparison.” – Care to read it again and pay attention? You’ll find the word excretion in there, if you’re careful.

      “And if you can do better, and believe me, it isn’t hard” – I doubt very much that this is true.

      “it’s just your one sided opinion taking up space on the web” – It was until you decided to chime in. Now we’re both taking up space on the web. Mind you, one of us is perfectly composed and the other read half the words in an article about a show he doesn’t care about and used arguably the most offensive word in the English language to insult someone he’s never met.

      Which are you?

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  10. Not many discussion boards for this show, so to anyone looking it up & you comes across this, this comment is for you.

    First off, If it’s not Archer, Rick and Morty, The Boondocks, South Park or The Venture Bros. it’s not worth your time. Animated comedies such as Family Guy, American Dad, The Simpsons, & maybe with the exception of Futurama have all their best years behind them & have really ran their course in my opinion. They’re just not smart anymore.

    This series has been aimed more towards Canadians with the writers stating that they go out of their way to have more jokes than not that likely only Canadians would get. That being said, I’m Canadian & this show is NOT funny & the animation is pretty much identical to that of which Fuzzy House Productions produces. I’m pretty open to most adult animated sitcoms, but this is just tasteless.

    Not surprised that this god awful mutated turd of a series got cancelled. So, if you’re into adult animation & are thinking of giving this a try, honestly, I tried to like it but just could not. Skip this series. It’s the epitome of shit. Peaaaaaaace

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  11. I know this detail was entered some time ago. It wasn’t that bad. I agree it’s a shit sandwich but it don’t taste THAT bad.
    Brickleberry, it put me to mind of that show, only a lot less funnier.

    Like

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